Old Archie


Old Archie was a rag and bone man

Who cruised the streets all day

With Mabel his trusted friend and companion

Who pulled the four wheel dray

Which he had purloined from a brewery

Which had been closing down

A big old red brick building

That was on the edge of town

Now Mabel was twenty eight years old

A big old dapple grey

Who cost old Archie a fortune

In biscuits and in hay

But they has been together forever

Or so it really seemed

To Archie as he sat upon the seat

Occasionally falling asleep and dreamed

Rag and Bone he used to shout

As loud as loud could be

And people would come out and give

Old clothes and other goods for free

Sometimes around the posh areas

He would have to pay

And that would just set him off

 Moaning the rest of the day

For Archie was a tightwad

Money seemed to be welded in his pocket

He even had a few pound notes

Around his neck in an old locket

But it also contained a picture

Of his beloved Flo

His wife for many a long year

The Lord decided had to go

So now it was only Mabel and him

Companions till the end

Working together all day long

Archie’s one true friend.

One day whilst out upon their round

Mabel caused a disgrace

Her tummy was not all it should be

She left manure all over the place

P C Smith came running

Stop he shouted loud and clear

Bur Archie being a little bit deaf

He really did not hear

The constable was now running fast

Gaining on the dray

But slipped upon some of Mabel’s mess

As Archie went on his merry way

He landed in a heap in the road

About twenty feet further adrift

Regaining his composure as best he could

Out came his notebook rather swift

I am arresting you he shouted

For causing this sorry mess

So let’s be having you matey

What’s your name and address

By now a crowd had gathered round

Complaining of police brutality

For picking on an old man and his horse

Only a rag and bone man you see

As P C Smith put away his notebook

Realising it was a waste of time

Mrs Jones came from up the road

A lady in her prime

Bucket and spade in hand

She started to scoop up the mess

It’s for my Roses she cried

Spilling some on her dress

Meantime old Archie and Mabel

Started off down the road

Having caused all chaos

His dray now with a full load

It had been just another day for Mabel and him

Who had seen it all, over the past twenty-eight years

A lifetime of hard work and laughter

Along with a few tears

So if you see them out when you’re passing

Just give them a wave and a cheer

Or even better still

Buy them a well earned beer 

What’s Gods Address


What’s Gods address

Because when I call he’s out

I sure I have it wrong

Because he never is about


I knock upon his door each day

To call and have a chat

But somehow, he never hears me

What should I make of that?


Is it me I ask myself?

Or has he just gone deaf somehow

I have tried to shout his name out loud

Until sweat springs to my brow


Maybe he will not hear me

Because I have been bad

Perhaps it’s just the way I think

And it has made him rather mad


I will try again tomorrow

This time I will knock quite loud

And climb the stairs to heaven

And catch the nearest cloud


It will take me in the back way

I will catch him unaware

Sneak up silently behind him

He will never know that I am there


So I can tap him on the shoulder

And ask him straight outright

You never open up the door to me

Especially last night


Where were you when I needed you?

I know asking is a pain

But when I want you, you are never there

And you have so much to gain


A sinner I may well have been

But nice with it all the same

I am sure you know me well by now

I know you know my name


You will have to change that door of yours

It’s just too wide and thick

I have knocked and knocked but you never hear

Maybe I should use a stick


Now look God come on play the game

You know I worship you

So let me in and we can have a chat

That is all I want to do


So if anyone knows your new address

Be sure to let me have it

Because I need it more than ever

Not knowing that he loves me, hurts a little bit


Every sinner needs your guidance

Especially those like me

So come on God just open up

And invite me in for tea


Old Aunt Sally


On the corner of the street

Next to the Haberdashery shop

Near the newsagents where dad gets his papers

Where I walk with him and skip and hop

There lies old Sally’s Antique shop

That sells all sorts of brick-a-brack

Aunt Sally can sell you anything

She really has the knack

All sorts of wares are on display

Mainly junk it looks to me

But I love when Dad takes us in there

It’s like Aladdin’s Cave you see

Its seems to go back through the shop

For miles and miles to a little one like me

As I walk amongst the things on show

There’s such a lot to see

One day I spied an old Rag Doll

Alongside a Teddy Bear battered and worn

And I asked my dad if I could take them home

Holding teddy’s arm which was badly torn

Brought memories flooding in

Of a child in the war walking the street

Holding him by the arm

I wonder what happened to that child

For now in my toy room he will go

And I will make him a coat

Fill the holes with stuffing

Because I really love him

That’s a fact I thank my dad

But late that night I was half a sleep

I swore he was singing

And moved but the song I never knew

I tried to tell dad

But he said what a strange imagination you have

Over the days when I went out to play

I visited the haberdashery to say

Do you know were the bear came from

Aunt Sally I asked but she was wondering where my dad was

All she could tell me was

It belonged to the boy in a great big house

But he had been killed in the war

And the song I heard was his favourite as a child

So on this day I plucked up the courage

And knocked on the door

There stood a man ten feet tall

Hello can I help you he said

So I explained but when he saw my teddy tears ran down his cheek

Little girl you are so sweet

Christopher loved this bear

Like pooh did his honey he would not part from it

For love or money

But on the day he got killed

I couldn’t stand to see it

So in Aunt Sally’s shop it has been buried

And now a young girl has made him like new

I’m so pleased for you

You can bring him in for tea

But did you know he sings

But like magic he stops

Because grown ups can’t hear

Just special children with a gift

Did you buy the rag doll as well?

Be carful she has magic powers

You see my son was a magician

With magic spells

He would play for hours

With his talking friends some alive some dead

So be careful when you wish

It will sometimes come true